Tuesday, May 31, 2005 •
yay!! Bloomberg! here i come!! i got my internship. after the grp interview and the phone interview yesterday. which in total added up to definitely not more than 1 hr. hahaha
so freaking nervous. and after the interviews, i really thought that the chances of securing a place there was slim. but i got a call this morning informing me that they have decided to offer me the intern place! :) now that i've gotten this internship, i am a bit paranoid. like what if i'm not good enough... then again, they will teach me what i have to know rite... what if i'm a slow learner! haha.. also.. i think the working hours are 8 to 6pm one hour lunch break. omg!! tt's very long. i think i'll be super tired i hope i don't fall asleep during work. and i guess i'll be having much earlier nights.
sigh no more holiday plans. but i guess they can wait. and i know in the previous paragraph i kinda complained a whole lot, but honestly, i feel really really happy and lucky to be offered this internship.
Sunday, May 29, 2005 •
Quotes from Man and Wife
by Tony Parsons (This is from a blog I was browsing. Hehe. For us to ponder.)
"Sometimes we have to stay away from the things we love. And learn to appreciate the things we need."
"If you are capable of loving someone, then there's never total freedom. There can't be. You give it up. You give up your freedom. For something that's better."
"How can two people who have loved each other ever really lose each other?"
"Life holds hostage all those we love."
Saturday, May 28, 2005 •
home! left aunt's place (daisy ave), sent my cousin (WH) home, dropped by at Singapore Expo before reaching home. told my parents i was bored see. and we decided to pop by the MPH warehouse sale at Expo for about an hour before they closed at 10pm.
in the past few days, i saw something twice and somehow it disturbs me. i saw mothers bringing their toddler daughters to the ladies. however, because the queue was too long, they carried their daughters so that she could relieve herself in the wash basin. the sink. yes. hmm.. eeeeeeeee. how dirty is that. what disturbs me is rather that they seem to care if they rinsed the basin after that. well, perhaps it's only human nature and nature's call. but... hmm... i don't find it a graceful or cultured act. maybe it's like about being yourself not caring what others think of you. but what would foreigners who see think? okay how abt even your locals. ah! nm. i just needed to pick on things. lol
my cousin (SH) received a PSC scholarship. :) happy for her! yet, seemingly reluctant to see her go overseas. i heard that most likely she would be taking it up. she's going to LSE. she's a smart and nice, humble lady. she deserves it every bit!
i am thinking about a whole lot of things right now. won't be sharing them here cos i haven't ironed them out yet myself. they are however along the lines of what kind of person do i wanna be. what kind of person do i wanna become. what kind of jobs do i want. i can't seem to be satisfied with myself. and i seem to be sitting on the fence a lot. but i like everything! i like all types. the funny thing is the types can be of two extremes yet i would enjoy both. one example, a high-flying career job perhaps filled with paperwork and people politics or a simple yet satisfying more laid back job relating to interest. same goes for lifestyle. i haven't got a clue what kinda lifestyle i prefer. my mood swings a lot. probably explains my swinging thoughts.
ahaha. now actually, okay. after blogging, i realised i just shouldn't think so much and screw my mind again. YET, it is only when we know what we're looking for that we can kinda move and progress in that direction. if not, i'd probably remain a stagnant boring person here all for a long long long while. and i don't like the thought of that. (all these said w.r.t the larger picture)
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ah! i overslept so didnt go for the first morning outing with sam and gang. then i got a message saying class dinner cancelled. so oh well! i'm at my aunts' place now.
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frenchloaf has been saying i am getting lazy to blog. i guess it's true. lol. been "busy" with watching dvds (cantonese; "war and beauty"), reading books (Nora Roberts; Chesapeake Bay Saga), playing Diner Dash (stopped for a few days already because i can't get past one particular stage), and going out meeting friends a lil. :) nothing has changed in the past couple of days though. still a bummer with a superbly warped body clock.
i received 2 calls in the past few days which made me happy. one, sweetheart from australia called! sweet surprise. she called also in response to an email i dropped in her mailbox just to say hi. her exams will be over in another 2 weeks time. she called to take her mind off her books a while. i miss her. it's been sooooo long since i saw her. i think a year, maybe. she doesn't sound like she'd change much. two, my very first internship interview call! i got shortlisted! yay! it's the first. i'm nervous. but i hope to get it. if i don't, then i'll just have to work harder at things i'm not good at (i know myself. hehe) if i do get it, yay! but my holiday plans have got to wait. sigh. Monday 11am. Wish me luck guys!
3 memorable outings. one, met frenchloaf for the first time after she returned from italy. went to hv and ate at nydc. i'm so glad she's ard again. :) two, date with paul. dinner at bedok 85 then pasir ris fishing pond viewings. supper at simpang bedok where paul introduced "new" prata type to ulu me. the tissue! nice, sweet and crispy. (date but nothing's going on. all the concerned and kaypohs and friends, ask me to find out more! muahahaha) three, movie -- "monsters-in-law" and dinner with "the swimming" friend. (not a date. hehe)
2 more outings to come. in 5 hrs, meeting sam and gang (chris, swan..etc i think). shoe sale somewhere in suntec. also ordering birks tmr! evening, jc class dinner. still a bit hesitant to go. why? the timing's a bit off since i'm leaving house early tmr. and if anyone has realised, a hole's burning in my pocket. not particularly close to any of my ex jc classmates but a reunion is always nice. shall decide later.
Monday, May 23, 2005 •
After a terrible Saturday night, I had a good Sunday evening. Went swimming again. At the condominium near my place. Thankfully my friend's Aunt lives there. Love the place.
I like to feel the water against my skin. And after swimming a few laps, the tired yet satisfying feeling makes me feel good. Company's good too. I am thankful for my friend.
I still have a sorethroat though. And a slight headache. Late nights are really no good. For the body and the mind. I need a normal healthy lifestyle. I think that would greatly boost my emotions.
Tomorrow (Monday) is Vesak Day. It'll be a public holiday in Singapore. Should I stay home? Or should I find stuff to do? I think I'll decide when I wake up. Please let me sleep well tonight.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005 •
There are so many cuties out there. Why did I fall for one who won't be with me until the end. It's all a sham. To those who are happy with their present other half, sorry for being bitter. But I guess I'll be better. Soon soon. That's what I've been telling myself but I know I don't forget things easily. My feelings don't fade easily.
I was watching "The Wedding Date" early this morning and it did remind me of a few things. Ultimately, I guess by not being so bitter, letting go and being ourselves, things will turn out better. Like what happened to Kat. Anyway, I guess I shall keep on believing that my prince charming will fall from the sky one day. Hehe.
Had a good afternoon with Lychee. Just had a late lunch at Cartel, walked ard, shopped a lil and bummed ard at her place. I enjoy her company very much. :)
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Good Morning!!! :D Ahahaha... Oh well, it's not that I haven't slept but more like I slept about 3 hours before waking up at almost 5am. Been awake since and obviously I'm wondering if I should get more rest before meeting up with dearest Lychee.
I've always liked the feeling and idea of breakfast and the morning air, sun..etc. However, as much as I have been trying to put myself to bed early these nights, I end up tossing and turning in bed for at least an hour or two before deciding that it is pointless, hence getting up to do stuff, afterwhich I go to bed again at around 6am. This time's a little different though because I did not toss and turn. I did sleep. Just not for long.
Sigh. When will I be able to revert my body clock? Teeheehee.. :p (It's the morning high.)
Monday, May 16, 2005 •
An uneventful Monday. Hopefully with the Survivor finale later, my Monday night will spice up. Hehe. Woke up at 330pm actually. Slept at ard 6am. I wanted to sleep by 2am last night. But I toss and turned in bed that I decided to get out, after an hour+ of turning and I started my CSI spree again. I have finally finished the whole of season 3, now ready to return these DVDs to my friend. To think I want to lead a healthier lifestyle. I tried.
Had quite an eventful Sunday though. Annie is back from Manilla! :) I also played tennis and tabletennis at the CAAS club at Changi Airport. Afterwhich my friend called me for a swim at the condominium very near my place. It was a totally relaxing night. The swim was fabulous. Loved it.
If i can afford a condominium when I'm older, I would want to buy one. Only for the Pool. :)
Friday, May 13, 2005 •
I cooked my own lunch again! Ahaha.. Okay, some people would say warm up though. LOL. I had pasta today! With fabulous mushroom sauce and erm, chopped up chicken franks and stripes of cheeeeeeese. YUMYUM! I thought of heating up the Campbell's Soup too but nahz... Would take too long and that would mean I would be having a two-course lunch! Lunch came with dessert and a drink. Dessert was a bar of Tronky! --> My favourite chocolate at the moment. Drink was a whole tumbler of Ribena! :)
Back to CSI! I've been trying to finish up the stack of CSI DVD I borrowed from a friend. Other than that, I've been bumming at home. Bumbumbum... I have been hanging up the washed clothes the past two days though. Until Annie comes home. Honestly, I've been sleeping and watching stuff and on my laptop the past few days. I know it's lazy but it's totally easy and brainless. Hehe.. I know I have more brainful stuff waiting for me to be done.
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oh ya.. i guess eating chocolates make me temporarily happier. i shall have a bar now! even though i'm still a lil bloated from dinner. hehe. i won't be surprised if after the hols, lorrie is fatter.
now i totally understand Awful's excessive blogging before she went overseas. I miss Awful. I miss Frenchloaf. Please you two. Be back quick. Then again, when they're back, Pudding will be gone. :(
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and i forgot to add that bumming ard does not help at all? makes me feel worse. to think that everyone else is happy and enjoying themselves. i can't help but feel like a loser at times. why am i wallowing is self-pity? okay not really. but i know deep down at least a small part of myself am. damn.
i must change things. yet, are things within my control?
Thursday, May 12, 2005 •
I'm all alone and at home. This is a really horrible feeling. I'm not really alone but my mum, dad and bro's asleep. And it's not even midnight. Oh well, when i hear my friends going places, having internships...etc I really wonder where i'm headed for. Truth is, an internship really builds credibility. Sigh, are my qualities and my resume really that bad that i didn't even get called up for an interview. Or did i not try hard enough. Same goes for all other aspects of my life.
Things are not going well in my life. That's the broad perspective. I am of course usually in my own world. Happy little me. Oblivious of everything and like a happy little lark, carefree and happy-go-lucky. But when i have to wake up to reality. Often it hurts. I wish i could stay in my world forever. Yet i know it'll never be and i'll only lose more should i remain in my world. It's delusional.
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A flash back of 2005 Rag Day memories: Frenchloaf, Pudding and Lollipop!I just downloaded the programme "Hello" to share and upload photos onto my blog. Yay! Of course this would mean that I will be posting more photos onto my blog. Hehe.. Just to test out, here's a first.
Well, I'm gonna be joining Rag Dance for my hall again this year so the photo above is just a preview. It's gonna be my 3rd time doing Rag Dance and I guess I'm feeling a bit icky. Hehe. It's always a great experience yet the journey, esp the day/night before the actual Rag Day can be such a bitch. I dislike the itchy body paint! Oh well..
Rag aside, I caught the finale to Amazing Race earlier. I am extremely happy that Uchenna and Joyce won. YAY!!!! I don't believe it but when they won, tears were welling up in my eyes. I guess I'm happy for them and it proved one thing: The good will be blessed. I think they played the game fair and square and on top of that, they were very helpful especially towards the elderly couple. Also, for those who did not follow the show, Joyce shaved her head at one of the fast forwards and I find that extremely courageous because that is something I would not do.
Today's Swanlynn's, Daniel's, Joel's and my beloved grandma!'s birthday. Happy Birthday all of you.
Sunday, May 08, 2005 •
I have moved 90% of my junk from hall, home. On my laptop now, chatting with my dear friends, (okay friend only now since I'm only chatting with Frenchloaf), whom I miss so dearly even though it's only been half a day?!?!
I miss waking up and walking to either Awful's, Frenchloaf's or Pudding's room to roll on their bed. I miss them doing the same. I miss talking to them. Now I'd have to call or msn only. It's so different. :( It's gonna be a horrid 3 mths without them around. I hope we make it a point to meet up. If not, I'd be quite sad and lonely. Hehe...
I'm currently waiting for my friend to pick me up so that I can get a lift to our hall's chalet. He's still in hall and lazy me would rather wait abt 2 hours for a lift than take a taxi or train ride there. Oh well, I do hope I don't feel awkward when I'm there cos I guess I'm not as close to the people whom I know are there.
I've been thinking about things. Actually okay, that's an understatement cos I think about things all the time. Just to different extents, hehe.. It's always sad when good things come to an end. But I guess we should be happy that our paths crossed at least once to begin with. And I'm not only referring to ex-boyfriends but friends in general. Sigh... Feeling a little melancholy.
Thursday, May 05, 2005 •
I am in C318, Awful's room. She's packing up and moving out of hall today and I am being a nuisance but hanging around. Hehe.
Gotta go to town to meet up with a primary school friend of mine, Andrea. She's studying in Canada but she's back here on a vacation. A little lazy to go to town and especially since I was there yesterday too but I guess, all for friends! =)
Last night at Zouk was rather fun. Mambo! Loved the music. Loved the company. And you know how people have different behaviours when they get drunk. Some people and my friends become "pinballs", giggly, angry...etc. I think I have a tendency to be a "sad drunk". Haha. Like emotional and start sobbing and crying. Not that I was drunk yesterday of course, but I guess I was referring to the reactions when one starts drinking.
3 months of vacation! I wonder how these 3 months will turn out...
Wednesday, May 04, 2005 •
LOOK again! This is Awful and I having a bit of fun! Ahaha..
I have a confession though. This was how Awful placed our photos on her blog. I'm a copycat! But you see, my beloved friends who read my blog, i.e. YOU, probably don't know of Awful's blog. So these photos are for you! Sorry Awful, I really liked this sequence. *embarassed*
Yay! I finally have a host to host images again. I forgot my previous host see. Hehe.. Silly me.
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LOOK! I revamped my blog! Muahahaha... Took a while. Like a few hours but what not when I'm super free now that the exams are finally over! Hehe.. I like this skin. Although there are several limitations, I still like it! I guess anything new is always nice.
Hey peeps, even though it might be more difficult to see everything at one glance, please remember that there are still scrollbars! So please please browse through and continue to tag me!!!
Tuesday, May 03, 2005 •
yay!! it's like less than 24hrs to my last paper... hmm.. i am not fully prepared. i don't suppose anyone can unless they have the examination questions. hehe.. erm but i kinda covered what i wanted to already. i guess i'll just look at my stuff again tmr.. yepz.. and since i'm waiting for my hair to dry i decided to blog instead of just stone! staring into space...
most of my friends.. okok all of my hall friends are sleeping! why??? cos later at 9am they all have "sport and history"! i'm one of those on the other half not taking that module.. hee..
i had an okay day today... rather interesting.. went to the library early in the morn till abt 4.30pm.. lunch was at holland v since we saw almost everyone flocking to the only open eating place near the central library, Macs! had dinner with mum and dad.. then studied at the YIH study room...
thinking of stuff now.. i realised i will probably miss hall in the 3 mths i'm going to be home.. all my friends.. not tt they will not be my friends anymore but all the times we spend together...etc geez.. it's quite heartbreaking.. what abt Awful! i'm so gonna miss her cos next sem she won't be ard anymore... i must must take pictures b4 i move out this sem.. and i must must meet up with all my hall friends as often as possible during the hols... not forgetting my other "outside" friends too la! hehe... so many other things i wanna and needa do too.. i'll draw up a list tmr! after my paper! :)
Monday, May 02, 2005 •
my last paper is tmr.. considering now is 3am on monday.. a bit panicky now yet totally waiting for it to be over.. i'm not prepared yet.. a few more readings to do.. and need to consolidate my thoughts... even though it's open book, i think it's not going to be easy... quite worried. only have myself to blame if it doesn't turn out well because i guess i didn't put in much effort during the semester for this module...
ooh i am listening to gold 90.5fm now.. but they have this advertisement with retro music in the background.. i am soooooo looking forward and missing mambos at zouk. haha call me a retro freak but i kinda like those cheesy actions with the retro songs... like it's a worry-less world... hopefully i'll be there this wed! hehe...
okay time to pack bag and sleep... home run.. here i come!
